Since moving back to Texas, I have rediscovered fast food. Every small town in Texas has a Dairy Queen, and I can only pass up the temptation of a White Chocolate Raspberry Truffle Blizzard (Blizzard of the Month) for so long. (To illustrate how ridiculous this is, remember I am lactose intolerant and Blizzards make me miserable. Turns my stomach into a cement mixer kind of miserable. ) And since I am stopping, why not add on some chicken fingers? Hmmm? I've had more fast food in the past four months than I have had in the last decade. In an attempt to end my downward spiral in to the poor eating habits of Middle America, I have penned this Ode to Fast Food. Enjoy.
Fast Food, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
Burgers, Foot Longs, Chicken Fingers with White Gravy...
Blizzards of every flavor, and Peanut Buster Parfait.
You make me throw up but I eat you anyway.
Oh Dairy Queen, the delicious food haven of every town over pop. 600, as your advertising claims, "That's what I like about Texas!"
Car hops, tater tots and Cherry-Lime Slushes
Thank you for having Grilled Chicken Wrap so I can pretend I am eating something healthy, but we all know tortillas are murder.
Sonic you are fast food that pretends not to be, plus you have a view of the beach, what could be more appropriate?
Popeye, thank you for starting a food chain that has nothing to do with canned spinach.
Your spicy fried chicken is heaven on earth, your biscuits are divine. Red beans and rice, corn on the cob and mac-n-cheese are your choice of sides. Large or small? Large! You bet! More carbs please!
Wendy you make my buger of choice. Who knew corners could be so delicious? Big Classic with cheese, biggie fries and Frosty to go! Your new Toffee Coffee Frosty is especially decadent, creamy and crunchy at the same time. Brilliant.
Breakfast tacos with chorizo, eggs and cheese. Thank you for giving me a reason to eat fast food for breakfast. Chips, queso, soft warm tortillas. Fajitas to go. Taco Cabana you are a Texas treasure. If they knew about you north of the border we'd be overrun by yankees.
Oh fast food you make me instantly gratified, but our torrid affair must end. You are delicious but you make me feel dirty inside. I can't live this way. I am going back to whole grains, lean proteins and non-starchy vegetables. Farewell, farewell. I'll always love you.
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Hot Guy on a Motorcycle
Ever since Sons of Anarchy came out on FX, I've been looking for my own Hot Guy on a Motorcycle (HGOM). For a while I was beginning to think he was a myth, because every guy I saw on a motorcycle was definitely not hot. Aged and derelict would be more accurate.
A few weeks ago I was driving from Austin to Rockport, and as I was passing through Refugio (pronounced re-fury-o), I finally saw him! He turned on to the highway right in front of me. He had a low rider style bike with the long handlebars, aviator shades, totally cool. He was obviously a local because other drivers were waving at him at the intersection we stopped at. He was to my left so I got to ogle him from the corner of my eye. He turned left at the intersection and I spent the last hour of my drive wishing it were on a harley instead of the battered old jeep. Sigh.
Meanwhile, I've been listening to The Secret on my iPod during some of these little roadtrips. Its a tad corny and Oprah-rific, but I basically agree with the theory that you have to visualize your self with what you want in order to attain it and listening to The Secret seems to help me focus on that. What does this have to do with my HGOM? Wait for it.
So there I was heading back to Austin, and just outside of Rockport I see a semi-hot guy on a motorcycle. My mind immediately drifted back to my HGOM in Refugio, who I decided to concentrate on for a few miles. Its about 40 miles to Refugio so I my mind had wandered by the time I rolled into town... but amazingly HGOM pulled right in front of me again! I was like OMG!!! I immediately tried to banish all stalkerish thoughts, but it was exciting nonetheless.
Look out HGOM, the Universe is drawing you closer to me. You can't resist forever...
A few weeks ago I was driving from Austin to Rockport, and as I was passing through Refugio (pronounced re-fury-o), I finally saw him! He turned on to the highway right in front of me. He had a low rider style bike with the long handlebars, aviator shades, totally cool. He was obviously a local because other drivers were waving at him at the intersection we stopped at. He was to my left so I got to ogle him from the corner of my eye. He turned left at the intersection and I spent the last hour of my drive wishing it were on a harley instead of the battered old jeep. Sigh.
Meanwhile, I've been listening to The Secret on my iPod during some of these little roadtrips. Its a tad corny and Oprah-rific, but I basically agree with the theory that you have to visualize your self with what you want in order to attain it and listening to The Secret seems to help me focus on that. What does this have to do with my HGOM? Wait for it.
So there I was heading back to Austin, and just outside of Rockport I see a semi-hot guy on a motorcycle. My mind immediately drifted back to my HGOM in Refugio, who I decided to concentrate on for a few miles. Its about 40 miles to Refugio so I my mind had wandered by the time I rolled into town... but amazingly HGOM pulled right in front of me again! I was like OMG!!! I immediately tried to banish all stalkerish thoughts, but it was exciting nonetheless.
Look out HGOM, the Universe is drawing you closer to me. You can't resist forever...
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Notes on Star Trek: Thank God for J.J. Abrams
After J.J. Abrams totally blew my mind with the season finale of LOST, I decided to cap off the weekend by seeing Star Trek. Now I think all of you know where my loyalties lie in the great cultural battle known as Star Trek v. Star Wars. I am firmly in the Star Wars camp, despite George Lucas' repeated attempt to defile his own creation. At least it started as genius while Trek was riddled with absurdity from day one.
It is my contention that J.J. Abrams has saved Star Trek from the laughing stock of pop culture by improving upon the Trek story line while at the same time keeping true to the characters we love and nodding to its campiness.
Some thoughts (spoiler alert!):
1. J.J. Abrams is a marketing genius. He managed to find a way to give us a young Spock while at the same time giving us the old, beloved Leonard Nimoy Spock. And better yet, he didn't see the need to send Nimoy Spock back to his appropriate time period, so he can trot him out for all the sequels that are sure to follow. Smart move J.J. but why not work in Shatner next time as well?
2. Casting was great. I thought the main crew was well cast, especially Scottie. Love that guy. I do have to question the choice to give Dr. McCoy more of a back seat role in this film... Kirk needs him to balance Spock. Just a thought.
3. I wish J.J. would have explained how the Grand Canyon showed up in Iowa. Or whatever that giant crater was supposed to be that James T. drives the roadster into as a wild youth. Anyone who has ever been to Iowa knows there is no cavernous rock formation that big in Iowa.
4. I love that J.J. has a sense of humor. One of the main reasons People Who Hate Trek, hate Trek is the predictability of certain situations. Trouble on an isolated world? Well let’s beam down the captain and most of the executive officers (plus one officer we have never seen before). Who dies in the dangerous situation? The no-name officer, of course. Everyone else escapes unscathed. J.J. cleverly worked this quirk into one of Kirk’s early adventures by adding “Olsen” to the Kirk/Zulu commando unit. Without giving away the details, Olsen doesn’t make it back to USS Enterprise.
5. One of the early laugh lines in the film is when we discover that Zulu’s hand-to-hand combat expertise is in fencing. Then he whips out some kind of swiss army knife sword and goes to town on a Romulan. Note to JJ… leave the swordplay to Star Wars.
6. Has anyone else noticed that all sounds in Hollywood’s concept of “space” are starting to sound alike?
7. If you are afraid of heights, this is not a good movie for you. My mom had to close her eyes through half the movie. There was a recurring theme of Kirk falling off the edges of cliffs and getting his ass pounded by just about everyone in the movie.
8. The torture scene. Disappointing. We see Capt. Pike strapped to a board, surrounded by water. I was like… OH NO THEY AREN’T! I really thought I was about to see the Romulan Capt. Nero waterboard a federation official! But I guess the producers lost their cajones and instead we got to see some squirmy bug thing dropped in Pike’s mouth. Now, if this was a nod to the famous scene in the Wrath of Khan where Khan drops the burrowing bugs in the Starfleet officer’s ear… it fell a bit short. Some things can not be improved upon. That scene still freaks my shit out after 25 years.
9. Medical advancement. We’ve achieved time-travel but haven’t been able to alleviate pain from childbirth? I mean, even Lucas came up with a Lamaze Droid. And what about poor Captain Pike confined to a wheelchair because of the bug that ate his brainstem? Couldn’t McCoy just wave that magical wand thing over him and cure him? No robotic legs even? I guess that is the difference between a Galaxy Far, Far Away and our own, boring galaxy of the future.
10. New and Improved Romulans! Dropping the vagina-headed aliens was a great leap forward for Trek. Not to say that the remaining aliens looked great. Bringing aliens to the screen is a continuing problem for film makers. If you go with costumed characters, its easy to end up with the Mos Eisley Cantina… but if you go with CGI characters you end up with Jar Jar Binks. It is a difficult balance to strike, but costumed aliens who are subtle and humanoid seem to work best… like Vulcans.
11. What the heck is red matter? Is it like the Force? Does it bind us all together? Is it like a super-powerful tractor beam? Is this part of the Trek canon? I don’t follow the series close enough to know whether or not I was supposed to know what red matter is or not.
I just re-read this list and it reads like a list of complaints. It really isn’t. I thoroughly enjoyed this movie and look forward to the sequels. But while I liked the back story on the characters and learning how the classic crew of Enterprise got together, I thought the overall plot was just so-so. It was episodic and the bad guys weren’t very compelling. I guess this has always been the problem I have had with Star Trek; there isn’t a great showdown between good and evil which sometimes leaves the plot feeling a bit hollow.
I think it’s safe to say that one of J.J. Abrams favorite themes is time travel. Now riddle me this, batman… if the Trek theory of time travel holds true, then can we assume that J.J. will apply the same theory to LOST resolution? Is Faraday wrong? (i.e. Whatever Happened, Happened. Can’t change the past.) The plot thickens.
Thanks for entertaining me again, J.J. It’s going to be a long 8 months until LOST resumes.
UPDATE: I got my aliens confused. It was the Klingons that had the vagina-like heads, not the Romulans. I don't think we've seen J.J.'s Klingons yet so they may still look ridiculous.
It is my contention that J.J. Abrams has saved Star Trek from the laughing stock of pop culture by improving upon the Trek story line while at the same time keeping true to the characters we love and nodding to its campiness.
Some thoughts (spoiler alert!):
1. J.J. Abrams is a marketing genius. He managed to find a way to give us a young Spock while at the same time giving us the old, beloved Leonard Nimoy Spock. And better yet, he didn't see the need to send Nimoy Spock back to his appropriate time period, so he can trot him out for all the sequels that are sure to follow. Smart move J.J. but why not work in Shatner next time as well?
2. Casting was great. I thought the main crew was well cast, especially Scottie. Love that guy. I do have to question the choice to give Dr. McCoy more of a back seat role in this film... Kirk needs him to balance Spock. Just a thought.
3. I wish J.J. would have explained how the Grand Canyon showed up in Iowa. Or whatever that giant crater was supposed to be that James T. drives the roadster into as a wild youth. Anyone who has ever been to Iowa knows there is no cavernous rock formation that big in Iowa.
4. I love that J.J. has a sense of humor. One of the main reasons People Who Hate Trek, hate Trek is the predictability of certain situations. Trouble on an isolated world? Well let’s beam down the captain and most of the executive officers (plus one officer we have never seen before). Who dies in the dangerous situation? The no-name officer, of course. Everyone else escapes unscathed. J.J. cleverly worked this quirk into one of Kirk’s early adventures by adding “Olsen” to the Kirk/Zulu commando unit. Without giving away the details, Olsen doesn’t make it back to USS Enterprise.
5. One of the early laugh lines in the film is when we discover that Zulu’s hand-to-hand combat expertise is in fencing. Then he whips out some kind of swiss army knife sword and goes to town on a Romulan. Note to JJ… leave the swordplay to Star Wars.
6. Has anyone else noticed that all sounds in Hollywood’s concept of “space” are starting to sound alike?
7. If you are afraid of heights, this is not a good movie for you. My mom had to close her eyes through half the movie. There was a recurring theme of Kirk falling off the edges of cliffs and getting his ass pounded by just about everyone in the movie.
8. The torture scene. Disappointing. We see Capt. Pike strapped to a board, surrounded by water. I was like… OH NO THEY AREN’T! I really thought I was about to see the Romulan Capt. Nero waterboard a federation official! But I guess the producers lost their cajones and instead we got to see some squirmy bug thing dropped in Pike’s mouth. Now, if this was a nod to the famous scene in the Wrath of Khan where Khan drops the burrowing bugs in the Starfleet officer’s ear… it fell a bit short. Some things can not be improved upon. That scene still freaks my shit out after 25 years.
9. Medical advancement. We’ve achieved time-travel but haven’t been able to alleviate pain from childbirth? I mean, even Lucas came up with a Lamaze Droid. And what about poor Captain Pike confined to a wheelchair because of the bug that ate his brainstem? Couldn’t McCoy just wave that magical wand thing over him and cure him? No robotic legs even? I guess that is the difference between a Galaxy Far, Far Away and our own, boring galaxy of the future.
10. New and Improved Romulans! Dropping the vagina-headed aliens was a great leap forward for Trek. Not to say that the remaining aliens looked great. Bringing aliens to the screen is a continuing problem for film makers. If you go with costumed characters, its easy to end up with the Mos Eisley Cantina… but if you go with CGI characters you end up with Jar Jar Binks. It is a difficult balance to strike, but costumed aliens who are subtle and humanoid seem to work best… like Vulcans.
11. What the heck is red matter? Is it like the Force? Does it bind us all together? Is it like a super-powerful tractor beam? Is this part of the Trek canon? I don’t follow the series close enough to know whether or not I was supposed to know what red matter is or not.
I just re-read this list and it reads like a list of complaints. It really isn’t. I thoroughly enjoyed this movie and look forward to the sequels. But while I liked the back story on the characters and learning how the classic crew of Enterprise got together, I thought the overall plot was just so-so. It was episodic and the bad guys weren’t very compelling. I guess this has always been the problem I have had with Star Trek; there isn’t a great showdown between good and evil which sometimes leaves the plot feeling a bit hollow.
I think it’s safe to say that one of J.J. Abrams favorite themes is time travel. Now riddle me this, batman… if the Trek theory of time travel holds true, then can we assume that J.J. will apply the same theory to LOST resolution? Is Faraday wrong? (i.e. Whatever Happened, Happened. Can’t change the past.) The plot thickens.
Thanks for entertaining me again, J.J. It’s going to be a long 8 months until LOST resumes.
UPDATE: I got my aliens confused. It was the Klingons that had the vagina-like heads, not the Romulans. I don't think we've seen J.J.'s Klingons yet so they may still look ridiculous.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
I Heart Lilly
OK, so my mom bought a puppy in February, Tiger Lilly Belle. I wanted to call her Tigerlily and my mom wanted Lilly Belle, we compromised. Let me just say I am crazy about this dog. She is about as cute as can be... shih tzu puppies must rank as some of the cutest creatures on the planet so I can't be faulted for not resisting her cuteness. She is a golden with a black mask and tips on her ears. She has the tiniest little nose ever.
Lilly follows me around all day, we can't be parted even for bathroom breaks. I have invented games for her like Duck-on-a-Rope. I tied a rope on her favorite stuffed duck and every time she goes for it I yank it away from her. This game can go on for hours. When we are not playing games, sometimes I sing to her. Generally popular songs that I have modified as an ode to Lilly's cuteness. For example, "Stand by Your Puppy" to be sung to the tune of "Stand by Your Man".
"Sometimes its hard to be a puppy.... "
If only I could sing.
When my mom comes home from mah johng we talk about all the cute things Lilly has done during the day... like hide her favorite toy behind the couch. Or see a lizard for the first time.
I mention all of this as an example of how desperately I need to get a life. I want to decamp for Austin next week and get at least a temp job. But I kind of don't want to leave Her Royal Cuteness.
Lilly follows me around all day, we can't be parted even for bathroom breaks. I have invented games for her like Duck-on-a-Rope. I tied a rope on her favorite stuffed duck and every time she goes for it I yank it away from her. This game can go on for hours. When we are not playing games, sometimes I sing to her. Generally popular songs that I have modified as an ode to Lilly's cuteness. For example, "Stand by Your Puppy" to be sung to the tune of "Stand by Your Man".
"Sometimes its hard to be a puppy.... "
If only I could sing.
When my mom comes home from mah johng we talk about all the cute things Lilly has done during the day... like hide her favorite toy behind the couch. Or see a lizard for the first time.
I mention all of this as an example of how desperately I need to get a life. I want to decamp for Austin next week and get at least a temp job. But I kind of don't want to leave Her Royal Cuteness.
Absent
Hey all... sorry I've been MIA... I can't really say I have done anything since I got back from Florida. And yes... the Roebke-Guttierez nuptials were a fabulous affair. I want to live at the Ritz-Carlton. According to The Secret, if I continue to visualize living at the Ritz, it will happen.
Its the freaking end of April and I have crap to show for it. Sigh.
Its the freaking end of April and I have crap to show for it. Sigh.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Guess what?
I am completely out of debt. My tax return paid the majority of it, and I cracked open my savings to pay off the remainder. Its a good feeling. It will be nice to start off with a clean slate once I get a job and am out on my own again!
Hopefully this will be motivating to those of you who are still chipping away at your own CC debt! Keep at it, its worth it!
Hopefully this will be motivating to those of you who are still chipping away at your own CC debt! Keep at it, its worth it!
Tuna Salad Hell
So I spent a delightful weekend with Bonnie and my friend Jennifer who fell off the face of the earth after getting married and having a kid (who now wants to hang out again now that she is getting divorced... hm. Maybe someday I will get to return the favor). Anyway, there was a lot of pregnancy talk, and kid talk. I have nothing to add to these conversations. Apparently Jenn had a natural birth, and Bonnie had an olive oil delivery with one of hers. (Thuy, somehow I think that silicone based lubricant you sell would be a better lubricant than olive oil, maybe you can start a trend... ) Anyway, I didn't have much to say.
I got back to Rockport to find my mom making a trough of tuna salad. Many of you have never had my mom's tuna salad. It rocks. Even if you don't like tuna salad, you will LOVE it. When my family gets together, we fight over it. People have been known to steal and horde it. I sometimes take out a sizeable portion and tuck it away under the produce in the fridge to rescue it from maurading nieces and nephews. The tuna salad is heavenly, but I usually put on 5-8 lbs overnight when it is in the house. It also sits in the stomach like cement, and any plans you had to work out, or even just get off the couch go completely out the window as the overwhelming urge to nap takes over.
Now, my mom made a trough when my sister and her family were here. I managed to survive the week by alloting myself one serving a day. I had it for breakfast for an entire week. Since that week I have been TRYING to be good in order to be svelte for Heather's wedding.
There is a whole trough in the fridge. I've had my one serving today. I am trying to resist its tangy bliss. It calls to me even now. Eat me. Eat me.
GAaaaaghhhhh!
Pray for me sisters! I can no longer resist the call.
I hope the Ritz has a seamstress on staff.
I got back to Rockport to find my mom making a trough of tuna salad. Many of you have never had my mom's tuna salad. It rocks. Even if you don't like tuna salad, you will LOVE it. When my family gets together, we fight over it. People have been known to steal and horde it. I sometimes take out a sizeable portion and tuck it away under the produce in the fridge to rescue it from maurading nieces and nephews. The tuna salad is heavenly, but I usually put on 5-8 lbs overnight when it is in the house. It also sits in the stomach like cement, and any plans you had to work out, or even just get off the couch go completely out the window as the overwhelming urge to nap takes over.
Now, my mom made a trough when my sister and her family were here. I managed to survive the week by alloting myself one serving a day. I had it for breakfast for an entire week. Since that week I have been TRYING to be good in order to be svelte for Heather's wedding.
There is a whole trough in the fridge. I've had my one serving today. I am trying to resist its tangy bliss. It calls to me even now. Eat me. Eat me.
GAaaaaghhhhh!
Pray for me sisters! I can no longer resist the call.
I hope the Ritz has a seamstress on staff.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Forgot to mention...
I managed to postpne my date until I get back from Austin. I am taking suggestions on how to handle the situation.
I haven't showered since Friday.
i.e. I haven't done anything for 5 days. Well not entirely true... just means that I am content to go to Wal-Mart or the beach with my hair in a bandanna and no make up.
I am going to Austin today so I suppose that task can't be avoided anymore.
In other news, the ladies came up with a way to get in touch with Todd Hunter's office without going through the Mills connextions. So his office has my resume, but I'm not anticipating that anything will come of it soon.
In Austin I am going to meet Martha's friend Sarah, who sounds like a lot of fun and will hopefully have some ideas for me. I'll stay with Bonnie, and we are planning to get together with another friend who has moved back to the area.
So that has been my big, exciting week so far!
I am really looking forward to Easter weekend, in which I will be driving my mom and Kay to Mission, Tx where we will be taking a trip south of the border (let me know if you need me to pick up any meds for you (non-narcotic of course)! I am also contemplating having permanent eyeliner applied. The only thing holding me back is knowing that it will only be a week before Heather's wedding... and I am already trying to get rid of the henna tatoo I had applied to my back two weeks ago...
Oh, didn't I mention that? My judgement may have been impared when I made that decision. My niece Alaina got one too. She picked cutesy flowers. I picked the Eye of Horus. (WTF? I mean, I like egyptology and all... but as a tat on my back? See? Judgement definitely impared.) I guess I have learned that I am definitely NOT a tatoo person. After the margaritas wore off I was like... craaaaapppppp. The good news is, that even though it is supposed to last for FORTY DAYS, my exfoliation regimin will have it gone by d-day (Heather's wedding).
So I am thinking about the permanent eyeliner, I am concerned that I will have two black eyes for the grand event. But its only $100 for both eyes!!! How can I resist?
I am sure there will be may tales to tell about the trip to Mission and the trip to the DMZ (aka Mexico)... including how I lasted 5 hours in the car with chain smoking all the way.
Ok, I'm going hit the shower. Later girls!
I am going to Austin today so I suppose that task can't be avoided anymore.
In other news, the ladies came up with a way to get in touch with Todd Hunter's office without going through the Mills connextions. So his office has my resume, but I'm not anticipating that anything will come of it soon.
In Austin I am going to meet Martha's friend Sarah, who sounds like a lot of fun and will hopefully have some ideas for me. I'll stay with Bonnie, and we are planning to get together with another friend who has moved back to the area.
So that has been my big, exciting week so far!
I am really looking forward to Easter weekend, in which I will be driving my mom and Kay to Mission, Tx where we will be taking a trip south of the border (let me know if you need me to pick up any meds for you (non-narcotic of course)! I am also contemplating having permanent eyeliner applied. The only thing holding me back is knowing that it will only be a week before Heather's wedding... and I am already trying to get rid of the henna tatoo I had applied to my back two weeks ago...
Oh, didn't I mention that? My judgement may have been impared when I made that decision. My niece Alaina got one too. She picked cutesy flowers. I picked the Eye of Horus. (WTF? I mean, I like egyptology and all... but as a tat on my back? See? Judgement definitely impared.) I guess I have learned that I am definitely NOT a tatoo person. After the margaritas wore off I was like... craaaaapppppp. The good news is, that even though it is supposed to last for FORTY DAYS, my exfoliation regimin will have it gone by d-day (Heather's wedding).
So I am thinking about the permanent eyeliner, I am concerned that I will have two black eyes for the grand event. But its only $100 for both eyes!!! How can I resist?
I am sure there will be may tales to tell about the trip to Mission and the trip to the DMZ (aka Mexico)... including how I lasted 5 hours in the car with chain smoking all the way.
Ok, I'm going hit the shower. Later girls!
Saturday, March 28, 2009
SOS
I have to get out of Rockport.
Thursday night I met my mom at the Yacht Club for cocktails. And the conversation turned to my job search, which as you know has been going nowhere. I mentioned that I had applied to the Rockport Art Center and luckily two of the ladies know the director and will put in a good word for me. Its just a part time gig and will keep me in drinks and new shoes in the interim.
The idea comes up that I should work for Todd Hunter, our State Senator. So I say, that is a good idea, who knows him? Hmmmm... hmmmm.... Why Burt Mills knows him!
Background: Burt Mills is the former mayor of Rockport. He is famous for getting a DUI for joy riding in the town's new fire truck. It made national news at the time. I went to high school with his kids. I had a mild crush on his son Jeremy. Unfortunately this is one of the few crushes I actually acted upon... and he wasn't into it. And to make matters worse he shagged one of my best friends... which essentially ended that friendship. For some reason she was bewildered that I would be upset about it.
Of course Jeremy is one of the few Rockportians who got his act together and went to school, etc. and is now the town dentist. He has a beautiful wife and they both hang out at the Yacht Club. And all of the Ladies LUUUUUV him. He shmoozes them up when he fixes their crowns and they all think he's the bee's knees.
I smile politely. (full disclosure: about five years ago I was down here visiting and my mom and Kay tried to set me up with him... I was like OMG!!!! NOOOO! But what could I do? Then he totally didn't show up at the Yacht Club. So he basically burned me twice.)
Back to the story at hand. Burt Mills knows Todd Hunter. And who do you suppose walks in at that very moment but Jeremy and his gorgeous wife. The Ladies immediately hail him and tell him that I need a job and could he intro me to Todd Hunter, etc. etc. I am so mortified I could have died on the spot.
I have to get out of Rockport.
So my mom's friend Paula has a stepson, Kevin. The Ladies LUUUUUVVVV Kevin in much the same way they LUUUUUVVVV Jeremy, except in this case I think the adoration is legitimate. He seems very earnest. He is a talented woodworker and is building a beautiful mantle for my mom's fireplace.
Kevin is showing up at the Yacht Club a lot. He asked me to dance at the St. Patricks Day party. Last night he actually called to see if I was there. Kay insisted that we stay out and meet him at Paradise Key.
All of the YC employees were at the Yacht Club because the old manager, Mark was there. Bryan, the regular entertianment at the YC, (he wears a pirate shirt) suggested that I go and read for a play being put on by a local theatre group. They are putting on Picnic, which happens to be the very first play I was in and I had the lead (if you haven't seen it, put it in your Netflix queue, its an excellent movie starring William Holden and Kim Novak). My mom told someone this and they wanted me to try out for it... I declined. But I agreed to read for them because, what the hell else do I have to do since the pool is closed for two weeks?
Anyway, what I am trying to say is that Kevin called this morning and asked if I would like to go to dinner tonight. Now, he is a great guy but I have absolutely no physical attraction for him. Its all very awkward because he is Paula's step son, etc. etc.
So I am probably going to have to go to dinner with him tonight.
fuck.
fuck.
fuck.
I have to get out of Rockport.
Thursday night I met my mom at the Yacht Club for cocktails. And the conversation turned to my job search, which as you know has been going nowhere. I mentioned that I had applied to the Rockport Art Center and luckily two of the ladies know the director and will put in a good word for me. Its just a part time gig and will keep me in drinks and new shoes in the interim.
The idea comes up that I should work for Todd Hunter, our State Senator. So I say, that is a good idea, who knows him? Hmmmm... hmmmm.... Why Burt Mills knows him!
Background: Burt Mills is the former mayor of Rockport. He is famous for getting a DUI for joy riding in the town's new fire truck. It made national news at the time. I went to high school with his kids. I had a mild crush on his son Jeremy. Unfortunately this is one of the few crushes I actually acted upon... and he wasn't into it. And to make matters worse he shagged one of my best friends... which essentially ended that friendship. For some reason she was bewildered that I would be upset about it.
Of course Jeremy is one of the few Rockportians who got his act together and went to school, etc. and is now the town dentist. He has a beautiful wife and they both hang out at the Yacht Club. And all of the Ladies LUUUUUV him. He shmoozes them up when he fixes their crowns and they all think he's the bee's knees.
I smile politely. (full disclosure: about five years ago I was down here visiting and my mom and Kay tried to set me up with him... I was like OMG!!!! NOOOO! But what could I do? Then he totally didn't show up at the Yacht Club. So he basically burned me twice.)
Back to the story at hand. Burt Mills knows Todd Hunter. And who do you suppose walks in at that very moment but Jeremy and his gorgeous wife. The Ladies immediately hail him and tell him that I need a job and could he intro me to Todd Hunter, etc. etc. I am so mortified I could have died on the spot.
I have to get out of Rockport.
So my mom's friend Paula has a stepson, Kevin. The Ladies LUUUUUVVVV Kevin in much the same way they LUUUUUVVVV Jeremy, except in this case I think the adoration is legitimate. He seems very earnest. He is a talented woodworker and is building a beautiful mantle for my mom's fireplace.
Kevin is showing up at the Yacht Club a lot. He asked me to dance at the St. Patricks Day party. Last night he actually called to see if I was there. Kay insisted that we stay out and meet him at Paradise Key.
All of the YC employees were at the Yacht Club because the old manager, Mark was there. Bryan, the regular entertianment at the YC, (he wears a pirate shirt) suggested that I go and read for a play being put on by a local theatre group. They are putting on Picnic, which happens to be the very first play I was in and I had the lead (if you haven't seen it, put it in your Netflix queue, its an excellent movie starring William Holden and Kim Novak). My mom told someone this and they wanted me to try out for it... I declined. But I agreed to read for them because, what the hell else do I have to do since the pool is closed for two weeks?
Anyway, what I am trying to say is that Kevin called this morning and asked if I would like to go to dinner tonight. Now, he is a great guy but I have absolutely no physical attraction for him. Its all very awkward because he is Paula's step son, etc. etc.
So I am probably going to have to go to dinner with him tonight.
fuck.
fuck.
fuck.
I have to get out of Rockport.
My Mom thinks I need to lose weight.
I just love it when she says what she really thinks. Thankfully I started on my weight watchers regime this week... and it was going great until Thursday... just like in DC...
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Yes, I overreacted.
My hair is great. In fact, I almost love it. I've already referred two people. Just have to remember no blow out next time.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Comments
FYI- I think I have fixed the settings so that you can leave comments now. Someone try it out!
My Hair Makes Me Look Fat
It was inevitable. Finding a new hair person is always painful, but after being so happy with Tina for the past few years, this is especially devastating.
I put a shout out on Facebook to get suggestions on where to get my hair done in Austin. Turns out someone I went to high school with just opened a new salon in downtown Austin. I checked it out and the website looked great so I thought I’d take a chance.
It took two hours and 15 minutes for a cut and highlight. And the color looks great, it really does. But the haircut lacks imagination. Straight, flat, boring. My hair is basically back to where it was before I whacked it off into my funky shag thing I had going on.
So now my giant round cranium is enhanced by the straight flatness of my hair. Think Gretchen Carlson on Fox and Friends, except she has more body than I do.
Hopefully I am being overdramatic and it won’t be so bad after I take a stab at fixing it myself. If anyone sees cute hair pictures or good celebrity hair out there, let me know. I need a picture to inspire.
I owe you a post on Oysterfest and my fun weekend with Mia, and coming soon will be something on my upcoming fun weekend in Dallas.
I hope you are all well. I am getting tired of being unemployed and homeless.
I put a shout out on Facebook to get suggestions on where to get my hair done in Austin. Turns out someone I went to high school with just opened a new salon in downtown Austin. I checked it out and the website looked great so I thought I’d take a chance.
It took two hours and 15 minutes for a cut and highlight. And the color looks great, it really does. But the haircut lacks imagination. Straight, flat, boring. My hair is basically back to where it was before I whacked it off into my funky shag thing I had going on.
So now my giant round cranium is enhanced by the straight flatness of my hair. Think Gretchen Carlson on Fox and Friends, except she has more body than I do.
Hopefully I am being overdramatic and it won’t be so bad after I take a stab at fixing it myself. If anyone sees cute hair pictures or good celebrity hair out there, let me know. I need a picture to inspire.
I owe you a post on Oysterfest and my fun weekend with Mia, and coming soon will be something on my upcoming fun weekend in Dallas.
I hope you are all well. I am getting tired of being unemployed and homeless.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Rocky Horror Weekend
Several Sundays ago, Kay called us to see if we wanted to go to dinner at Paradise Key. No reason for me to get up on a Monday morning so I’m game. Another of the ladies, Mary A., joined us. At dinner, Mary told us about her granddaughter who goes to Southwestern University and is starring in the Rocky Horror Show that the theatre department is putting on.
Me: Oh we should totally GO!!! That would be so fun!
Kay: We could stay with my niece!
Mary: I’ll find out how to get tickets!
By the time we got home, Kay had called her grandson, James (aka Bubba or Bub) to drive us to Austin. By ten o’clock the next morning I had the link to the website for Rocky Horror tickets with instructions to buy six tickets. Done.
Sidebar: There are unpronounceable-polish-vodka (UPV) filled moments when my mom and Kay openly fantasize about how great it would be if James and I got together. So I am totally aware what is going on at this point.
James is 27.
We eventually added a seventh to the party, Christina, Kay’s granddaughter and James’s sister. I know her from my 2007 Vegas trip with my mom and Kay for Christina’s 30th birthday. She is a quiet one, I like her a lot but I think she is a little unsure of me. I think I made major inroads with her this particular weekend, I am going to win her over eventually.
So the big day finally rolls around ( it’s the day after the Booze Cruise for me, I don’t know what everyone else’s excuse was) , we (Me, Mom, Kay, James and Christina, and New Puppy Lilly) all pile into Kay’s minivan. James drives, I am co-pilot/navigatress. Mom and Kay sit in the bucket seats in the next row, Christina has the back bench so she could nap- she is a nurse, and got off shift at 7:00 AM.
We have Christina’s GPS and that is the main means to guide us to Kay’s niece’s house (Susan), and that is fine except anyone with any GPS experience knows that you sometimes have to use your own judgment and override some of the ridiculous instructions it gives you. Well GPS disagreed with Kay’s way to get to Austin. And James opted to take the GPS way rather than Kay’s way. A brave man in my opinion.
Long story short: We got there. With the chaperones in the back seat James and I made forced conversation (I KNEW that I had to initiate conversation, lest I be the one to blame for the match not being made. )
G: I hear you are graduating soon?
J: Yes. In May.
G: Are you planning a big party to celebrate?
J: Welll…
And blah and blah and blah.
We finally arrive at Susan and Mike’s home in Austin. It was one of those slightly older homes ( 25-30 years old) that has been completely remodeled and looks incredible. They had the biggest television I have ever seen, and an incredible movie and game selection and… most importantly an authentic Darth Vadar mask! I heart these people!
Eventually we make it to Georgetown to see the play and I have a moment of panic. I haven’t seen Rocky Horror in at least 10 years and I kind of forgot how risqué it was. And I’ve never seen it live.
It was really, really randy.
I was worried that the older crowd was going to be offended. See, I never know which Mom is going to show up. The Catholic School Girl or the Good Time Gal? Luckily it was the GTG.
It was a great production and everyone loved it. Except Christina, who didn’t come back after intermission. So whatev.
Afterward we played a game called “Screw Your Neighbor”. Awesome, awesome card game. The premise is: everyone is dealt one card, and you can either keep it or trade with the person on the left. Don’t want to be stuck with the lowest card (ace is low, king is high). It is so fun! We played til 4 AM.
So James. I don’t think either of us felt as though there was going to be a romance there, but he is a nice guy worth knowing and its not like I don’t need friends in the area, right?
Poor James. I am sure that he didn’t know that I knew that he had a girlfriend who is married with 3 kids. But my mom looks out for me.
James’s girlfriend deserves her own post. The lady’s name is Michelle Lee (pronounced Michelly, which I think is the awesomest name ever.). James told me, over a hand of SYN, that Michelly is into the Fuzzy Animal Thing.
Insert eyebrow raise.
Did you see that episode of Entourage where Turtle had to dress up in the animal costume to get it on with the girl?
Uh-huh.
Wellll anyway. If it hadn’t been in front of his family I would have given him a hard time about it but I decided it would be prudent to stay quiet.
It was an odd night. Where I was labeled as being the quiet, demure one (?ha? like I said, never know which mom is showing up, GTG or SM).
Instead of calling Kay an effing biatch every time she passed me an ace(which was every time I had to pass her something), I deemed her the “Black Hole of Despair” . What can I say? It works for me.
It was a fun trip.
UPDATE: Apparently Christina didn't come back for the second act of the play because the preemie baby she was taking care of for the past six weeks died.
Me: Oh we should totally GO!!! That would be so fun!
Kay: We could stay with my niece!
Mary: I’ll find out how to get tickets!
By the time we got home, Kay had called her grandson, James (aka Bubba or Bub) to drive us to Austin. By ten o’clock the next morning I had the link to the website for Rocky Horror tickets with instructions to buy six tickets. Done.
Sidebar: There are unpronounceable-polish-vodka (UPV) filled moments when my mom and Kay openly fantasize about how great it would be if James and I got together. So I am totally aware what is going on at this point.
James is 27.
We eventually added a seventh to the party, Christina, Kay’s granddaughter and James’s sister. I know her from my 2007 Vegas trip with my mom and Kay for Christina’s 30th birthday. She is a quiet one, I like her a lot but I think she is a little unsure of me. I think I made major inroads with her this particular weekend, I am going to win her over eventually.
So the big day finally rolls around ( it’s the day after the Booze Cruise for me, I don’t know what everyone else’s excuse was) , we (Me, Mom, Kay, James and Christina, and New Puppy Lilly) all pile into Kay’s minivan. James drives, I am co-pilot/navigatress. Mom and Kay sit in the bucket seats in the next row, Christina has the back bench so she could nap- she is a nurse, and got off shift at 7:00 AM.
We have Christina’s GPS and that is the main means to guide us to Kay’s niece’s house (Susan), and that is fine except anyone with any GPS experience knows that you sometimes have to use your own judgment and override some of the ridiculous instructions it gives you. Well GPS disagreed with Kay’s way to get to Austin. And James opted to take the GPS way rather than Kay’s way. A brave man in my opinion.
Long story short: We got there. With the chaperones in the back seat James and I made forced conversation (I KNEW that I had to initiate conversation, lest I be the one to blame for the match not being made. )
G: I hear you are graduating soon?
J: Yes. In May.
G: Are you planning a big party to celebrate?
J: Welll…
And blah and blah and blah.
We finally arrive at Susan and Mike’s home in Austin. It was one of those slightly older homes ( 25-30 years old) that has been completely remodeled and looks incredible. They had the biggest television I have ever seen, and an incredible movie and game selection and… most importantly an authentic Darth Vadar mask! I heart these people!
Eventually we make it to Georgetown to see the play and I have a moment of panic. I haven’t seen Rocky Horror in at least 10 years and I kind of forgot how risqué it was. And I’ve never seen it live.
It was really, really randy.
I was worried that the older crowd was going to be offended. See, I never know which Mom is going to show up. The Catholic School Girl or the Good Time Gal? Luckily it was the GTG.
It was a great production and everyone loved it. Except Christina, who didn’t come back after intermission. So whatev.
Afterward we played a game called “Screw Your Neighbor”. Awesome, awesome card game. The premise is: everyone is dealt one card, and you can either keep it or trade with the person on the left. Don’t want to be stuck with the lowest card (ace is low, king is high). It is so fun! We played til 4 AM.
So James. I don’t think either of us felt as though there was going to be a romance there, but he is a nice guy worth knowing and its not like I don’t need friends in the area, right?
Poor James. I am sure that he didn’t know that I knew that he had a girlfriend who is married with 3 kids. But my mom looks out for me.
James’s girlfriend deserves her own post. The lady’s name is Michelle Lee (pronounced Michelly, which I think is the awesomest name ever.). James told me, over a hand of SYN, that Michelly is into the Fuzzy Animal Thing.
Insert eyebrow raise.
Did you see that episode of Entourage where Turtle had to dress up in the animal costume to get it on with the girl?
Uh-huh.
Wellll anyway. If it hadn’t been in front of his family I would have given him a hard time about it but I decided it would be prudent to stay quiet.
It was an odd night. Where I was labeled as being the quiet, demure one (?ha? like I said, never know which mom is showing up, GTG or SM).
Instead of calling Kay an effing biatch every time she passed me an ace(which was every time I had to pass her something), I deemed her the “Black Hole of Despair” . What can I say? It works for me.
It was a fun trip.
UPDATE: Apparently Christina didn't come back for the second act of the play because the preemie baby she was taking care of for the past six weeks died.
Redneck Riviera Booze Cruise
Robert is one of my few high school friends that I keep up with, and he is one of an even smaller subset who is still in Rockport… lucky for me. He and his wife have been having me over almost every Friday night.
There are many things one should know about Robert. He is one of the first people I knew when I moved to Rockport in 8th grade. That means I have known him for 21 years. Yes, 21 years. He was my first boyfriend’s (David) best friend (more on that later). Robert still likes me even though I played a rather large roll in the fiasco that got him sent off to military school( a story for another time). I appreciate his friendship. A lot.
Robert is living the Rockport Dream… i.e.: hunting guide during hunting season, fishing guide during fishing season and complete bum between seasons. Robert met his wife Jenn when he was working in recruiting in Connecticut. She was his boss. And she is ten years older than him. I think she is great and so obviously perfect for him, I am so glad that he is with someone I want to be friends with. I love seeing my friends deliriously happy.
So anyway, last Friday I went to Robert and Jenn’s for dinner and drinks. They have a little house on a canal that leads out to the bay, patio, boats, bbq… you get the picture. Its a total bachelor pad with a great wine selection.
His two neighbors were in attendance. One they were very excited to introduce me to, Jason: who is our age, single, and apparently doesn’t work either; and the other a really old guy who has a crack whore living with him who claims one of his wives was advance for Reagan and Bush I. So as usual, the conversation was scintillating. Robert grilled a feast of trout, shrimp (bacon wrapped… unnnghghgllll) and redfish and I swear it was the best seafood I have had since I have been here. Afterward Rob decided we were going on a booze cruise.
It was a little damp out but it was totally worth it. We could see the STARS. And wildlife! And did you know that Farrah Faucett was from Corpus Christi? Well we floated by her HOUSE! There was beer, dogs and country music. It was fun, and made me very reminiscent of my girlhood in Rockport. Good times. Why did I ever leave?
Sooo Robert gets a phone call while we are on the boat. It’s Austin. My ex-boyfriend David’s little brother (do I still have to count him as an ex if it was from 8th grade? Robert says yes.). Austin is at the house, and we have to cruise back to port. When we get back Austin and his friend are waiting for us.
Robert: Austin! This is Ginny! She used to date David the year you were born!
Gaaaaahhhhh!
Anyway, sweet kid, a lot like his bro but not nearly as good looking. It was a good night.
There are many things one should know about Robert. He is one of the first people I knew when I moved to Rockport in 8th grade. That means I have known him for 21 years. Yes, 21 years. He was my first boyfriend’s (David) best friend (more on that later). Robert still likes me even though I played a rather large roll in the fiasco that got him sent off to military school( a story for another time). I appreciate his friendship. A lot.
Robert is living the Rockport Dream… i.e.: hunting guide during hunting season, fishing guide during fishing season and complete bum between seasons. Robert met his wife Jenn when he was working in recruiting in Connecticut. She was his boss. And she is ten years older than him. I think she is great and so obviously perfect for him, I am so glad that he is with someone I want to be friends with. I love seeing my friends deliriously happy.
So anyway, last Friday I went to Robert and Jenn’s for dinner and drinks. They have a little house on a canal that leads out to the bay, patio, boats, bbq… you get the picture. Its a total bachelor pad with a great wine selection.
His two neighbors were in attendance. One they were very excited to introduce me to, Jason: who is our age, single, and apparently doesn’t work either; and the other a really old guy who has a crack whore living with him who claims one of his wives was advance for Reagan and Bush I. So as usual, the conversation was scintillating. Robert grilled a feast of trout, shrimp (bacon wrapped… unnnghghgllll) and redfish and I swear it was the best seafood I have had since I have been here. Afterward Rob decided we were going on a booze cruise.
It was a little damp out but it was totally worth it. We could see the STARS. And wildlife! And did you know that Farrah Faucett was from Corpus Christi? Well we floated by her HOUSE! There was beer, dogs and country music. It was fun, and made me very reminiscent of my girlhood in Rockport. Good times. Why did I ever leave?
Sooo Robert gets a phone call while we are on the boat. It’s Austin. My ex-boyfriend David’s little brother (do I still have to count him as an ex if it was from 8th grade? Robert says yes.). Austin is at the house, and we have to cruise back to port. When we get back Austin and his friend are waiting for us.
Robert: Austin! This is Ginny! She used to date David the year you were born!
Gaaaaahhhhh!
Anyway, sweet kid, a lot like his bro but not nearly as good looking. It was a good night.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Fat Tuesday
Fat Tuesday
Okay, I apologize for not posting sooner, but I’ve been busy… doing what I am not sure. Last week was a lost week. But I promised a good Fat Tuesday story so here it goes.
There was a lot anticipation running up to the Yacht Club’s Fat Tuesday Party. The Yacht club has a new manager. The old manager, Mark, told one of the members to Fuck Off at a private party he was catering. Mark hit the road shortly after that. This is only important because the new manager, Chuck, didn’t know that Ms. Gardner (my mom’s best friend, aka Kay) ALWAYS gets a table for Fat Tuesday. So we didn’t have a table. Kay was really upset about this because she ALWAYS goes to the Yacht Club for Fat Tuesday.
I innocently suggest that we have dinner somewhere else and crash the bar. I am hailed as genius. To seal the deal Kay called and reserved barstools for us.
So the grand day finally rolls around and I am wishing that I could cancel because I am feeling a little blue… a lot blue actually… on the verge of tears all day. But cancelling would cause more pain than enduring it so I suck it up and go.
The Septuagenarians are out in full Mardi Gras regalia, masks, beads the whole bit. The club brought in a great jazz band and I slowly got out of my slump and started to enjoy myself (translation: had a couple of vodkas). Had a nice conversation with Gayle who is an artist and jewelry designer. She will let me use her kiln if I ever get moving on the jewelry thing. Chatted with Suzette, my high school librarian, who wants to set me up with her son when I get to Austin. Suddenly I notice out of the corner of my eye that Kay has snagged some hapless fellow walking in to the bar and is moving in my direction at an unnatural speed. She put his hand in mine and commanded: “Dance!”
He looked bewildered and I said, “We may as well dance because she won’t rest until we do.”
“Who WAS that?”
“That’s Kay”
“Is she your grandma?”
“No, she is my mom’s best friend.”
“I don’t understand…”
“Kay is on a mission from God to get me married off. But I see you are already married so you’re safe!”
“Er uh yeah…”
Long story short, he was a great sport about it and made the mortification factor much less. We talked for a long time and I discovered he is the silent partner at one of the better restaurants in town, Paradise Key (Thuy you have been there- it’s the outdoor tiki bar), owns a record label, and worked in DC for awhile as a contractor in the Old Executive Office Building. He didn’t seem to want to elaborate on what he was doing at the White House.
Meanwhile, I gaze into the crowd for a moment and notice that Lita Lay-a-Man (I’ll save that story for another time, but she is Kay’s nemesis) is giving me the Mal Ojo, and she wasn’t being shy about it. So I give her the Eyebrow Raise. She looked away first. It was a small but important triumph. I’m not sure what I have done to attract Lita’s notice besides pick up a married man at a bar but I figured I better I better quash it before I become the Scandaleuse of Rockport.
The band’s last set was a tribute to the Godfather of Soul, James Brown so we all shook our tailfeathers to Sex Machine and called it a night.
Coming soon: Redneck Riviera Booze Cruise and Rocky Horror Weekend
Sidebar: discovered that the feeling of despair was nothing more than PMS. What is the point of being on the pill if you just get your period whenever it feels like showing up?
Okay, I apologize for not posting sooner, but I’ve been busy… doing what I am not sure. Last week was a lost week. But I promised a good Fat Tuesday story so here it goes.
There was a lot anticipation running up to the Yacht Club’s Fat Tuesday Party. The Yacht club has a new manager. The old manager, Mark, told one of the members to Fuck Off at a private party he was catering. Mark hit the road shortly after that. This is only important because the new manager, Chuck, didn’t know that Ms. Gardner (my mom’s best friend, aka Kay) ALWAYS gets a table for Fat Tuesday. So we didn’t have a table. Kay was really upset about this because she ALWAYS goes to the Yacht Club for Fat Tuesday.
I innocently suggest that we have dinner somewhere else and crash the bar. I am hailed as genius. To seal the deal Kay called and reserved barstools for us.
So the grand day finally rolls around and I am wishing that I could cancel because I am feeling a little blue… a lot blue actually… on the verge of tears all day. But cancelling would cause more pain than enduring it so I suck it up and go.
The Septuagenarians are out in full Mardi Gras regalia, masks, beads the whole bit. The club brought in a great jazz band and I slowly got out of my slump and started to enjoy myself (translation: had a couple of vodkas). Had a nice conversation with Gayle who is an artist and jewelry designer. She will let me use her kiln if I ever get moving on the jewelry thing. Chatted with Suzette, my high school librarian, who wants to set me up with her son when I get to Austin. Suddenly I notice out of the corner of my eye that Kay has snagged some hapless fellow walking in to the bar and is moving in my direction at an unnatural speed. She put his hand in mine and commanded: “Dance!”
He looked bewildered and I said, “We may as well dance because she won’t rest until we do.”
“Who WAS that?”
“That’s Kay”
“Is she your grandma?”
“No, she is my mom’s best friend.”
“I don’t understand…”
“Kay is on a mission from God to get me married off. But I see you are already married so you’re safe!”
“Er uh yeah…”
Long story short, he was a great sport about it and made the mortification factor much less. We talked for a long time and I discovered he is the silent partner at one of the better restaurants in town, Paradise Key (Thuy you have been there- it’s the outdoor tiki bar), owns a record label, and worked in DC for awhile as a contractor in the Old Executive Office Building. He didn’t seem to want to elaborate on what he was doing at the White House.
Meanwhile, I gaze into the crowd for a moment and notice that Lita Lay-a-Man (I’ll save that story for another time, but she is Kay’s nemesis) is giving me the Mal Ojo, and she wasn’t being shy about it. So I give her the Eyebrow Raise. She looked away first. It was a small but important triumph. I’m not sure what I have done to attract Lita’s notice besides pick up a married man at a bar but I figured I better I better quash it before I become the Scandaleuse of Rockport.
The band’s last set was a tribute to the Godfather of Soul, James Brown so we all shook our tailfeathers to Sex Machine and called it a night.
Coming soon: Redneck Riviera Booze Cruise and Rocky Horror Weekend
Sidebar: discovered that the feeling of despair was nothing more than PMS. What is the point of being on the pill if you just get your period whenever it feels like showing up?
Thursday, February 26, 2009
The Recession Affects DC Dating Scene...
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/02/24/AR2009022403925_pf.html
Hopefully someone thought to address this in the stimulus package.
Hopefully someone thought to address this in the stimulus package.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Link du Jour
For those of you with an interest in health care reform:
http://www.ibdeditorials.com/IBDArticles.aspx?id=320283664692927
Ben Sasse is one of my former colleagues at HHS.
http://www.ibdeditorials.com/IBDArticles.aspx?id=320283664692927
Ben Sasse is one of my former colleagues at HHS.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Day X of unemployment, Day X of New Texas Life
I have completely lost track of time. Weeks slip by and I can't give you any explanation of what has happened in the past several weeks. I'm quite sure I haven't been on any job interviews. I haven't gotten anywhere on any of my little "unemployment projects". Let me enumerate:
1. Find Job
2. Paint Mom's condo
3. Work on jewelry
I have made zero progress on all fronts.
Things I've learned:
1. I have no appropriate clothing for the slovenly life.
2. Your mother is still your mother no matter how completely irresponsible she is.
3. My mother has terrible taste in vodka. I've had a headache since I got here. Blaming it on a sinus infection didn't work as well as I had hoped.
4. American Idol is the glue that binds our country together.
Okay, tomorrow I am going to a Fat Tuesday party at the Yacht Club. You know there will be a story. I'll try to write it ASAP.
1. Find Job
2. Paint Mom's condo
3. Work on jewelry
I have made zero progress on all fronts.
Things I've learned:
1. I have no appropriate clothing for the slovenly life.
2. Your mother is still your mother no matter how completely irresponsible she is.
3. My mother has terrible taste in vodka. I've had a headache since I got here. Blaming it on a sinus infection didn't work as well as I had hoped.
4. American Idol is the glue that binds our country together.
Okay, tomorrow I am going to a Fat Tuesday party at the Yacht Club. You know there will be a story. I'll try to write it ASAP.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
First Post: Day 21 of Unemployment, Day 13 of new Texas Life
Hi Everyone,
Thanks for tuning in. I have been officially unemployed for 21 days now, and the anxiety is just starting to settle in. I think its because all I do is watch the news and listen to talk radio all day with my mom. I am starting to understand why she is so anxious all the time.
The trip down was uneventful, and I managed to stay ahead of the bad weather. Day one of the drive was gorgeous, I drove through Virginia and Tennessee. I even took the time to stop at a few places, like the Stonewall Jackson Memorial and Appamattox. (Pictures will be coming soon if I can ever figure out how to work my newfangled telephone.) I topped outside of Knoxville. The second day was less fun. It rained all day and visibility was low. Due to this I was forced to skip places I wanted to see like the home of Andrew Jackson, Davy Crockett (or was it Daniel Boone? Can't remember now), Dollywood and Graceland. But I did clear 600 miles that day and stopped in Hope, Arkansas. Lemme tell you, there ain't much going on in Hope, but the people were very friendly. The roads froze overnight so I had to wait until 1oish to get on the road. I passed into Texas around noon on the third day and got a little misty-eyed, I confess. I stopped in Dallas and had lunch with my friend Trina, then pushed all the way south to Rockport. In all, the trip was about 1600 miles. I have to thank Steve Jobs for creating the iPod, otherwise there is no way I would have made the drive in the craptacular jeep with no radio.
So I spent my first five days in Rockport hanging out with my mom and the other Mah Jong Ladies. Its been wild. On day 6 I had to put my foot down and just say NO to another happy hour. The weather has been perfect, 70's and sunny. I have only run into two people I went to high school with, and both encounters were friendly and not awkward. As many of you know, this has been one of my greatest fears... running into classmates and not recognizing them. So far, so good.
I have been to Wal-Mart 5 times since I have been here, and so far I have shown remarkable restraint. However, I have come to the conclusion that if Wal-mart doesn't sell it, you probably don't need it.
I have also joined a cardio class and a yoga class. I am the youngest person by about 30 years in both classes. The cardio is set to 50's music. The classes are "$7 if you aren't a member." So its real cheap livin' here on the South Texas Coast.
Last Thursday I took off for Austin to visit my friend Bonnie and see if I could rustle up any contacts to meet with about employment opportunities.
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